Unfortunately, life throws us a lot of challenge. Some more than others and at various degrees of intensity, but on occasion we all have to peel ourselves off the canvas.  Beyond our own troubles, many times we are faced with the opportunity to provide comfort to someone close going through a struggle.

As we continue on our journey to build and strengthen our character, it is important to reinforce the power of presence compared to the words we say to comfort those in the crucible of life.

Most of us are aware of the cold, hard reality that eventually it is our decision alone to make to move forward through a difficult experience or wallow in the struggle.  However, we all need our moment to grieve.

There are a few actions we take in the presence of a struggling friend that have been shown over time to not be very effective.  It maybe our own nervousness or insecurities that drive some of the unfortunate activities, but they usually do more harm than good. (1) We talk too much about how we can relate and lend some “profound” advice (2) We remind them that we “told them so” or “I knew this would happen.” (3) We reach beyond our reality and say something like, “I know how you feel.”

In the midst of comforting someone in a difficult spot, our presence is more powerful than our words.

The academic research and our practical experience would remind us all that just being there is a source of comfort.  Not spouting some philosophical wisdom or relating our own experience, but just our presence can aid the afflicted more than our “brilliant” speech.

Our presence and our often our tears say much more than our words. For those of us who often feel anxious about what to say or what to do, it is important to be reminded that there is greater value and impact in just being present when aiding and comforting those closest to us. Just start with being there and let the journey begin.

When we become self-aware enough to realize our words are not the most relevant source of comfort and we exercise the discipline to just be present to comfort those in need, we will build and strengthen our character and our Character Creates Opportunity® to be a source of comfort to those in a difficult spot.