There is a common path that we all journey on as we continue to build and strengthen our character.  Despite how our world continues to grow more complex and uncertain in our homes, businesses and communities, we all share a common path.  We do not journey alone, rather we journey together in relationship with others…whether we admit it or not.

The enclosed graphic is an attempt to depict the common path that most relationships travel on towards a journey of health or harm.

There are several concepts contained in this graphic depiction of the strength of relationships over time, but below are ones that I wanted to specifically highlight:

• There is no finish line with regards to our impact on the relationships around us. Even in death, the legacy of our relationships lives on in the lives of those left behind.
• Every single important relationship in our lives endures some significant ups and downs.
• When we choose to guide our thoughts, decisions, and actions by principles like honesty, compassion, and sacrifice, we strengthen our character and our relationships. When we fail to guide our thoughts, decisions, and actions by those same principles, we weaken our character and our relationships.

As we individually reflect on the truths above, it is not uncommon for us to think about our own ability and willingness to sustain the effort over the long haul. How can we sustain our efforts along this journey when we are told (a) There is no finish line (in essence, what is our pace for a race that has no finish line?) (b) There are some significant high points combined with some pretty significant low points and (c) We need to take responsibility for the relationship even though it “takes two to tango.”

Whether you find yourself today on a high point or a low point on this graph with an important relationship, here are a few suggestions that I hope will be some support and encouragement to keep moving forward in building and strengthening an important relationship.

Stay Humble:  We really do reap what we sow as defined in the Law of the Harvest.  This is a very well-worn, principled path to achievement.  Although life is not always fair, more times than not, if we set a goal, make a plan to achieve that goal, work hard over time on delivering on the plan, we will reap a harvest and accomplish the goal.  We need to be careful not to let the momentum of our success build our pride as we will have a tendency to miss warning signs of pending challenges and our decision making relies on our own track record and fails to take the counsel of others.  If we do not stay humble, the transparency that is our new reality has a tendency to crush our pride in very public and painful ways.  Stay humble.

Stay Hungry:  One of the biggest threats to building and strengthening our relationships is when we get complacent and comfortable.  When we deny the reality that our journey will be filled with ups and downs, we get comfortable and complacent in so-called “good times.”  We fail to spend energy learning and growing in our relationships.  When our bellies are full, the bills are paid, and the sun is shining, we still need to hunger after raising the bar on ourselves and our relationships by delivering on the basics: serving more than taking, understanding more than judging, and listening more than talking.  Stay hungry.

Stay in the Ring:  No one is perfect and we all fall short from time to time.  It is important that we do not quit the fight when we make mistakes.   We should stay in the ring and keep fighting the good fight.  There is no more important game in town than building and strengthening our character and our relationships to have a positive impact along our journey.  Don’t choose to become a spectator, no matter how many times we fall short.  Stay in the ring.

As we stay humble, stay hungry, and stay in the ring, we will build and strengthen our character and Character Creates Opportunity® to strengthen our relationships and have a greater impact in our homes, businesses, and communities.

For many parts of the country the fall colors are in full display.

Even though most of us are not farmers by trade, we can sense the abundance of harvest time during the fall season.

As we continue to build and strengthen our character, harvest time helps to remind us of an important truth that we have a tendency to forget during the seasons of life.  The fall season and the harvest time remind us of the one basic natural law that most directly translates into a relevant, practical, and universal truth necessary to accomplish our hopes and dreams:  The Law of the Harvest; simply, you reap what you sow.

The law of the harvest is the simplest and most powerful life transforming principle.  Ironically, it is also the one that we need a consistent, steady reminder of its simplicity and truth during the twists and turns of our life’s journey.

The law of the harvest, in the natural world, is as true as the law of gravity.  If you want to reap an abundant harvest of corn or soybeans in the fall, there is only one pathway to follow: The Law of the Harvest.  If we asked any farmer 2,000 years ago or one today in the fields of Iowa, we would get the same general response.  There are no shortcuts to an abundant harvest.  We must spend time in the winter to make a plan and prepare to implement when the spring comes. In the spring, we must prepare the ground and plant the seed.  In addition, throughout the spring and summer, we must cultivate the fields through a long growing season.  Then, and only then, will we reap an abundant harvest in the fall. 

There is no way to take a short cut.  We cannot vacation in the spring and summer and then jam an entire growing season into September.  There is no way to pay for the “Speed Pass” lane on the farm and there is no “Easy” button.  The natural law of the harvest will always be our judge.  Just like the law of gravity governs our eventual return to the ground no matter how high we jump, the law of the harvest governs our ability to produce our most essential food sources for life.  In addition, the law of the harvest governs our ability to accomplish our most personal hopes and dreams.

If we want healthy relationships with those closest to us, the law of the harvest will be our judge.  Are we vacationing all spring and summer with the expectation that relationships will be fine when tough times hit (friendly reminder…the tough times will hit)?  Or are we doing the hard work today that looks like sacrifice, selfless service, and the humility to listen and learn?

In our own personal development, the law of the harvest will always be our most steady path to lasting growth and accomplishment. If we want a more fulfilling career path, then we need to be intentional about making a plan and working the plan.  If we are expecting someone in “management” to come and spoon feed us a fulfilling career plan, we may be waiting for a long time.  If we want to maintain our physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual health, we need to make a plan and work the plan.  Lasting health is built over time.  The law of the harvest reminds us that there is no such thing as an overnight success in reaching our hopes and dreams.

Despite our best efforts to adhere to the law of the harvest, there is the occasion when it just does not work out.  Sometimes a storm hits and hail or heavy rains ruin a season of work.  Similarly, in our personal lives, we can be genuinely giving our best effort to live consistently according to the law of the harvest and we experience an unfortunate and tragic end to a season of effort.

Just as on the farm and in our own lives, we do our best to keep moving forward through an unforeseen tragedy and we persevere with our own unique ways of coping through the upcoming winter season.  Then, with the return of the next spring, we have another season of opportunity to start again and more often than not, the law of harvest will go our way in the next season on the farm and in our lives.

In the most important areas of our lives, it is time to ask a most direct question, “Are we preparing to reap an Abundant Harvest?”    In our character…marriage…parenting…friendships…careers…community?

We reap what we sow

I hope we can all use this fall season as a moment of support and encouragement to apply the law of the harvest to achieve our hopes and dreams.  As we become intentional about living according to the law of the harvest, we will build and strengthen our character and Character Creates Opportunity® to achieve our goals no matter what our present situation.

Unfortunately, life throws us a lot of challenge. Some more than others and at various degrees of intensity, but on occasion we all have to peel ourselves off the canvas.  Beyond our own troubles, many times we are faced with the opportunity to provide comfort to someone close going through a struggle.

As we continue on our journey to build and strengthen our character, it is important to reinforce the power of presence compared to the words we say to comfort those in the crucible of life.

Most of us are aware of the cold, hard reality that eventually it is our decision alone to make to move forward through a difficult experience or wallow in the struggle.  However, we all need our moment to grieve.

There are a few actions we take in the presence of a struggling friend that have been shown over time to not be very effective.  It maybe our own nervousness or insecurities that drive some of the unfortunate activities, but they usually do more harm than good. (1) We talk too much about how we can relate and lend some “profound” advice (2) We remind them that we “told them so” or “I knew this would happen.” (3) We reach beyond our reality and say something like, “I know how you feel.”

In the midst of comforting someone in a difficult spot, our presence is more powerful than our words.

The academic research and our practical experience would remind us all that just being there is a source of comfort.  Not spouting some philosophical wisdom or relating our own experience, but just our presence can aid the afflicted more than our “brilliant” speech.

Our presence and our often our tears say much more than our words. For those of us who often feel anxious about what to say or what to do, it is important to be reminded that there is greater value and impact in just being present when aiding and comforting those closest to us. Just start with being there and let the journey begin.

When we become self-aware enough to realize our words are not the most relevant source of comfort and we exercise the discipline to just be present to comfort those in need, we will build and strengthen our character and our Character Creates Opportunity® to be a source of comfort to those in a difficult spot.

I am not sure where you find yourself today, but I would be willing to guess that not everyone is walking on Easy Street.

There is most likely an important relationship that once was close but has now grown cold.  There is most likely a struggle at work on a project, a team, or hitting a budget.  In our once tranquil communities, there is most likely some tension and safety concerns.

As we continue on our journey to build and strengthen our character, an important part of our personal growth is in maintaining our efforts to reach our goals when it is the time to pay the price.

Throughout the ages, in various forums, it has been said that sorrow is the price we pay for love.  Failure is the price we pay for success.  Pain is the price we pay for compassion.  We all could add a few more to this price list.

The human experience is such that we cannot experience the full potential of love without having experienced the pain of sorrow, loss, and a broken relationship.  We cannot demonstrate the full potential of compassion without having experienced our own sense of misery and suffering.  We cannot have a full appreciation of achievement without having journeyed through the valley of failure.

Those “full” souls around us, we can probably see a few in our mind’s eye right now, are the ones who have experienced, journeyed, and stretched the boundaries of the “other side” of the human experience and have paid a high price.    We all have a unique life journey.  However, even in our uniqueness, we have all experienced both sides of the journey and the price we paid has made an impact on us.

Here are a few thoughts to remind us about the price to pay:

• There is always a price to pay. The other side of love, joy, and peace will always be a part of our journey.  The ultimate purpose for the other side I don’t claim to know, but for the present, the other side brings us to a greater level of fullness for love, compassion, and commitment to reach our full potential.
• Look, learn, and appreciate those around us who express a fullness of life for love, compassion and persistence for they are certainly the brave souls who have stretched the boundary on the other side. We should follow the example of their fullness.
• Share our story…at least with those we care about most (perhaps not on social media, but face to face would be the best encounter). Others need to hear the truth that there is always a price to pay.  We are not forever walking on Easy Street.  We will make consistent progress on reaching our full potential as we are reminded of the truth about the price to pay.

It is an important reminder, that as we pay the price on the other side of our journey, we will build and strengthen our character and our Character Creates Opportunity® to reach our full potential.

There is an important reality we all must face.  Even with all the support and care we may have around us, there are times when we are truly on our own.

• When taking an exam in biology class, we are on our own.
• When dealing with an unruly 2-year-old in a crowded shopping mall, we are on our own.
• When making a sales pitch to a customer, we are on our own.
• When covering a wide receiver man-to-man on defense, we are on our own.
• When we are “in the moment” with a difficult relationship conflict, we are on our own.
• When we face that choice right now to support a harmful addiction, we are on our own.
• When we enter the ring, we are on our own.

For many of us, we have others in our lives who care for us and provide much needed support and love.  Having healthy, supportive relationships in our lives forms a critical foundation for a life of positive impact.  However, the most difficult and necessary reality we all must face is that there are certain critical moments in life when we are all alone and need to stand and deliver.

As we continue on our journey to build and strengthen our character, an important challenge we need to accept is that we are on our own as we guide our thoughts, decisions, and actions.

Below are a few positive outcomes from accepting the reality that we are on our own:

1. We learn that we are responsible and accountable for the decisions we make. Playing the “blame game” is not an option when we are on our own.
2. We become free to guide our own thought-life, not mom or dad, a spouse, teacher or boss. We own our thoughts…and what we think, we become.
3. We are well-positioned to make a decision on our faith. Just like in the Biblical story of David and Goliath.  David was physically alone in the valley with Goliath, but he knew he was not truly alone.  When we find ourselves all alone in life, we are in a most perfect position to make a decision on what we believe.

As we accept this most difficult and necessary conclusion that even with others around us, there are times when we are all alone, we build and strengthen our character and our Character Creates Opportunity® to reach our full potential.  Also, as President John F. Kennedy most famously said, “Pray not for easy lives, pray to be stronger men,” we are in a great position to make a decision on what we believe.

Let’s face it.  There is a lot of stress and worry in our world.  It is becoming more and more difficult for all of us to put on our “happy face” on a routine basis and sweep stuff under the rug.

It is not just geopolitical factors and a stumbling global economy that are driving the tension. We experience most of the pressure in our homes, schools, at work, and in our communities.  Peace, joy, and happiness seem to not make interesting headlines, so we usually get a real adult dose of the pressures of our world from all the major news outlets.

At times, a little stress in our lives helps to kick us into gear and get down the path we should have been going a while ago.  For the most, however, consistent stress and worry is not healthy.

One important truth is that stress and worry do not take away the pain that may come tomorrow, but they sure take away our strength for today.  Today and tomorrow are often connected by stress and worry.  As we continue on our journey to build and strengthen our character, principles like perspective, hope, and carpe diem (seize the day) with help us effectively deal with stress and worry in order to reach our full potential.

How we guide our thoughts, decisions, and actions around today and tomorrow will help to determine our impact.  Here are a few thoughts to consider in order to connect today and tomorrow in a most meaningful and productive way:

• Reality check. It is important to acknowledge the truth that we all have some degree of stress and worry. We are not a one-off freak show because we worry and feel stressed out. Sure, some of us may be a bit better at concealing it, but we all live with it.
• Small steps. The Grand Canyon was not created by a meteor strike. It was the slow steady movement of water over time. It is tempting to think that one great event, a great pump-up speech, or some motivational insight will help us overcome stress and worry.  Practical experience teaches us that our daily habits, the laying of bricks one by one, is what brings about a solid foundation for lasting change.  
• All we have is today.  Living productively today by being present, mentally and emotionally, is our best way to link today and tomorrow.  Maximizing our impact today brings a sense of peace about facing tomorrow.  To be very candid, there will be times when the worry of tomorrow will be a bit too much to bear by just trying to stay focused on today.  When that is the case, one small step to take is to use today to completely focus on preparing for tomorrow.  The active preparation for tomorrow has a natural way of building confidence to face the next day’s challenges.

We all will face stress and worry throughout our lives.  As we take small, consistent steps to guide our thoughts, decisions, to maximize today, we will build and strengthen our character and Character Creates Opportunity® to have a positive impact on those around us and enable us to reach our full potential.

Finding truth these days seems so elusive.  It is not just because we are in a political season.  Our world continues to grow in complexity and intensity which provides an opportunity to cover up truth in a maze of complicated, uncertain, and seemingly unique situations.

As we continue on our journey to build and strengthen our character, there is one simple, universal, and timeliness truth that we will cover in today’s blog that should not be dismissed among the complexity that continues to grow all around us.

Before covering the one truth, here is a little background.  At Harvest Time Partners, the intent of our work is to reinforce that Character Creates Opportunity® to reach our full potential regardless of our situation.

Why is character so critically important?

In answering that question, below are two realities we all must face in life:

1. We will experience both ups and downs, great highs and great lows. Whether it is in school, work, our community, and certainly in our homes, we will encounter situations that provide us with an opportunity to learn and grow. There is no “easy street” to live on…we cannot fully appreciate great highs without experiencing great lows.
2. There are always three aspects to our experiences:

a SITUATION: There is our present situation.  Sometimes our situation is beyond our immediate, personal control like the weather, a call from a close friend with an unexpected terminal illness, a reckless driver running a red light, an outburst from an individual in an overwhelming situation, etc.  Other times, we made a decision to place ourselves into a certain situation.

a GAP: There is a gap, a moment in our consciousness, that forms our response to the situation.  The gap could be a split second or a long period of time.

a RESPONSE: There is our response to the situation.

The one simple, universal, and timeless truth is this: How we fill the GAP will determine our potential and our emotional health. 

In the GAP, lies our character.  We are not confined to a stimulus-response type paradigm like animals.  Our unique human quality, our character, provides us with the potential to choose our response in any situation.

The truth about our potential in the GAP has been around for ages.  The world’s dominant religions all teach this truth and modern history has provided numerous examples of this truth.  We possess the potential to rise above our situation and effectively use the GAP between our situation and our response.

Our character is Standing in the Gap® between a situation and our response.

Our character is our inner voice (our internal compass) that guides our thoughts, decisions, and actions.  When we guide our thoughts, decisions, and actions by principles like courage, loyalty, honesty, and commitment, we build and strengthen our character.

As our character is strengthened, we develop our most effective response in the GAP. 

Our most effective response will eventually lead to an improved situation and a pathway to reach our full potential and sustained emotional health…and the opportunity continues with every situation.

How does this play out in the real world?

In the workplace:

• With a situation of tremendous personal success, do we take all the credit or do we acknowledge the principles of teamwork and the commitment and sacrifices of others?
• With a situation of a major shortfall, do we blame the boss, company red tape, competition, or do we acknowledge the principles of personal responsibility and continuous learning to expect of a better outcome next time?

In the classroom:

• With a situation of a poor grade on an exam, do we blame the teacher and the “system” or do we acknowledge the principles of preparation, planning, and humility to ask for help?
• With a situation of bullying or shaming, do we ignore the environment, or do we acknowledge the principles of courage and compassion to defend those who may not be able or willing to defend themselves?

In the home:

• With a situation of a wayward teenager or adult son or daughter, do we dismiss them or do we acknowledge the principles of loyalty, commitment, and understanding to ensure no one feels all alone?
• With a situation of a struggling marriage (all marriages go through difficult times), do move quickly to the exit, or do we acknowledge the principles of commitment, sacrifice, and gentleness (strength under control) to navigate the incredibly painful episodes in marriage?

As we face situations in life, there is always a gap between our situation and our response.  How we fill that gap will determine our potential and our emotional health.  Our character stands in the gap and our Character Creates Opportunity® to reach our full potential regardless of the situation.

If we chose to believe the statistics, either ourselves or someone close to us on our left or right struggles with feeling alone.  If we take an honest reflection of our own lives, there are probably times when we felt the sense of being out there all alone facing a particular situation:

• In the workplace, we can feel alone in dealing with a difficult boss, being a part of a project team that just doesn’t function like a team, or when we lost that “critical” account and everyone is turning their eyes on us.
• In school, when the “cool” group leaves us behind or we are chosen last on the playground for kickball, we can feel a bit lonely.
• In the home, we can feel alone during times of struggle in a marriage, children whose birth order may align with certain experiences (it is more than just the middle child syndrome), or when adult children start making life choices that conflict with the hopes of parents.

We can all feel lonely from time to time.   

There were two times in my adult life when I have walked down the road with a friend facing a terminal illness. In both experiences, they commented how wonderful it was to have family and friends around to help them in their most difficult situation.  However, both of them, from very different backgrounds and walks of life, made the same comment to me that even with all these people around, their journey down that final road is an extremely lonely one.

As we continue to build and strengthen our character, embracing the bright side of loneliness will help each of us reach our full potential throughout the ups and downs of life in our home, the workplace and community.

Like most things in life, we can view challenges as a reminder of our own weaknesses or we can use challenges as opportunities to learn and grow. We make that choice every day and dealing with loneliness is no different.  We have a choice.  There was recently some published research on the best ways of coping with loneliness and of all the options like group therapy, community intervention, pharmaceutical treatments, etc., the most effective was some individual support to encourage changing our own thoughts and beliefs about ourselves.

As we view these occasions of loneliness as opportunities to grow, here are a few ways to remind us of the bright side of loneliness.

1. The first step towards self-improvement. The quiet of loneliness is a helpful place because the first step of any great movement starts with struggles in the present.  In the quiet of loneliness, quite often we can see the need for change.  Whether it is in our careers to find something purposeful that excites us, or in our educational pursuits to study something that can help us to have a real positive impact, or in our homes to take steps to be a better spouse or parent.  Our desire to improve our situation starts with some dissatisfaction of the present.  In the cold quiet of loneliness, we often find the spark to ignite positive change in our lives.
2. We can make a quick turnaround. In the final assessment, making a shift in mindset is all up to us. There is empowerment and energy that comes with standing and facing our situation alone without the challenges of miscommunication, unmet expectations or half-hearted commitments that sometimes comes with large group efforts.  We can move quickly in guiding our own thoughts, decisions, and actions.  As we look into the mirror, we need to ask, “What are we waiting for?”
3. A helping hand to others. Our journey through loneliness can be a helpful source of encouragement to someone who needs it most. We should be genuine and authentic in sharing our journey with someone else.  As Plato once said, “Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a harder battle.” Someone close to us may need to hear our example of overcoming, but they may be too ashamed, embarrassed, or hurt to ask.  Sharing our journey with those we care about most should be thought of as a potential source of encouragement to them, not a needed badge of honor for ourselves.

As we chose to see the bright side of loneliness, we can increase our chances of overcoming.  We will continue to build and strengthen our character and Character Creates Opportunity® to reach our full potential and have a positive impact on others.

Many times we wish for a quick fix to move rapidly through some challenging times.

• Financial struggles – We wish the lottery numbers would come our way or that long lost Uncle Harry shows up on the doorstep with a briefcase full of money…don’t count on it.
• Business struggles – We wish our first product would be the “must have” product for the market and we struggle to keep up with demand…don’t count on it.
• Family struggles – For the most painful of all of life’s struggles, those in the home, we wish those dark times in a marriage or those “know it all” teenage attitudes could just be avoided…don’t count on it.
• And why can’t our YouTube video go viral like so many others? Don’t count on it.

Although it may seem like a great option, the quick fix to struggles actually does more harm than good.  There is an overwhelming amount of evidence that shows a quick fix is not the most effective path to reach our full potential.  When a quick fix arrives, we end up wasteful and most often unhappy when the “fix” fades away and the “fix” always fades away sooner than we think it can.

As we continue on our journey to build and strengthen our character, it is important that we make the choice to embrace the struggle of the journey as we would not want it any other way.  It is highly unlikely that the lottery solves our problems, the next big thing scales our business and somehow we enter a period of family bliss like the TV shows of our youth.

Below are a few reasons to help encourage all of us to embrace the struggles and enjoy that fact that we will need to work hard for a long time to succeed in the marketplace, save our marriage and raise our children effectively in this uncertain and complicated world.

1. A sense of peace from a “hard day’s work.” There is no quick fix that can surpass the peace experienced after successfully enduring a long struggle.  Whether that is the completion of a difficult physical workout, the reflections after a graduation, the silver or gold anniversary celebration, or the signing of a major business transaction.  We rise above the pain of the struggles and reflect peacefully on the journey that we walked through to reach a major goal.  No quick fix can match that feeling of overcoming through a long journey.
2. Continual learning and personal growth. The reality is that we only learn through the struggles.  Ask any coach at any level of play.  Teams learn more from a loss than a win.  We learn more from poor product launches than when they go well.  Struggles bring personal growth and growth leads us down the path to reach our full potential.
3. Setting the example for others to follow. Whether it is coworkers, family members, or friends in the community, we are being observed.  We set a strong example for others to follow when we embrace the opportunity of the struggle.  The spirit to continue is contagious and we light a spark for someone else to continue in their own, often unspoken, difficult struggle.

As we face the reality that a quick fix to our problems is not in the cards and we learn to embrace the struggles of hard work, disappointment, and outright confusion, we will continue to build and strengthen our character and Character Creates Opportunity® to reach our full potential.

The bookstore shelves (or Amazon.com) are lined with helpful hints on handling difficult relationships and tips on how to handle conflict with someone important in our lives.  These resources help address the reality that we don’t live on an island.  Life is about relationships and relationships, even with the best intentions, will get complicated, strained, and a bit sloppy from time to time.

The important relationships in our home, workplace, and community are worth our best effort to keep them moving forward in a positive direction.

With this blog, we have often discussed the importance of understanding one another because of the cold reality that we each see the world as we are, not as it is.  Deep understanding of each other’s point of view often leads to forgiveness and forgiveness brings about the opportunity for redemption even when relationships have become broken and shattered.

As we continue on our journey to build and strengthen our character an important principle to sustain healthy relationships is taking the long view in our day to day interactions with those important in our lives.

If we agree with most relationship experts and perhaps our own honest reflection of our life’s journey, we would see that most of us have a tough time with difficult conversations with those closest to us.  One of the great dichotomies of life is that conflict of ideas and decisions in the home, workplace, and community can create real difficult situations, but yet confrontation, healthy discourse, and diversity of opinions are the life blood of organizations and families. (Take heart parents who argue frequently…research says our kids will be better able to think on their own because they constantly see their parents with different opinions which drives them to think for themselves because their parents certainly haven’t solved it for them.  For those of you who have the “perfect” relationship with no disagreements or where that “one person” always gets his/her way, be forewarned, your kids may not be well prepared to handle life’s inevitable differences of opinions.) 

If we take the time to reflect back over conflicts and difficult conversations, quite often we realized we made a mountain out of a mole hill, the issue that brought about the conflict was not the “real” issue, or it just was not a really big deal after all.  Time is a great counselor because it gives us perspective.

One of the most difficult interpersonal challenges we all face is how to take a long term perspective in the heat of the moment.

There is always a gap between our situation and how we respond.  Standing in that gap is our opportunity to take the long view in the heat of the moment.  Principles such as understanding, responsibility, loyalty, and commitment, help us to rise above the heat of the moment and widen that gap to create a more constructive interaction to solve difficult problems.

When we chose to take the long view in the gap between our situation and our response, we take several steps towards sustaining health in our important relationships:

1. We focus on the principle and not the person. If there was dishonesty in the situation, we focus on the breakdown of an important principle.  We don’t just call someone a lying, selfish jerk.  Addressing the principle without attacking the person opens the door for dialogue.
2. Timeless and universal principles such as honesty, loyalty, and commitment give us a strong foundation to more effectively see others’ points of view. Our foundation on principle also helps keep our own emotions in check in the heat of the moment.
3. We set an example for others to follow…our character stands in the gap between our situation and our response and principle based behavior is contagious.

We have tremendous potential for growth and development as we stand in the gap between our situation and our response with thoughts, decisions and actions based on principles such as loyalty, commitment, and perseverance.  As we stand on timeless and universal principles, we will continue to build and strengthen our character and Character Creates Opportunity® to build healthy relationships that grow stronger rather than weaker with different perspectives and the conflict that results.